it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Randomize
