i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
