he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
There was a lot of him and a little penis
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
