i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
