I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
