You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
