I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize
