I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
