So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
