I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize