My sheets look like a crime scene.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize