Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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