dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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