I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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