some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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