Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
