I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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