she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Randomize
