he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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