I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Randomize
