first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize