i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
