I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
