don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
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