question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
