who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Randomize
