Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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