i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
