dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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