i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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