real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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