Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
