Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
