how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize