She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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