a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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