No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Randomize
