he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize
