thus making me awesome and them whores
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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