do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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