I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
