Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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