I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Randomize
