I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
