I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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