Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
