i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
