Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize