Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
