At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize