I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
